BusGirlFeminismn
(but the thing this is we hate women cause we don’t love our mothers enough if you think about its really that simple cuz if you love your momma how could you hate women. it really don’t make no sense, and i be really feeling like these women haters blame they momma for everything they don’t like about life like cause she gave you life she owe you a perfect life and when you ain’t get that perfect life you turn to women hate?)
BusGirlFeminismn
i was confused in my youth, women like foreign lands, had a conquerors rotten tooth, another fat boi trying to write his way into eternity, i ain’t even wanna eat, i would’ve taken a pill; just to never be hungry, but fat boi was addicted to that feeling of meaning, escaping as soon as you bleed it, treating women like buses, catch one when i can, try to explain myself into a man; then hop off when she can’t understand,
BusGirlFeminismn
(when i think about women hate in rap i feel so depleted cause we've been living with the woman hate in our beats so long they feel like the melody. I done heard so much women hate in rap, i can’t even hear it nomo. how tough is it to hate women? how much of a hustle is it to pull yourself up by putting women down, how i fell for this shit, blow my mind. we can’t listen to our women cause we can’t listen to nobody. that’s not evolution. how we gonna hate the thing that creates? How we gonna degrade the thing we desire most and can’t replace? we give that white man a free bus pass for the whole year but love our women, that’s the shit we fear.)
BusGirlFeminismn
Bus Girl told me women and men were =... sure, sure, that’s what we like to say as people, but, obviously, not when it comes to the physical. She gawked, that too, nigga; u sound pitiful, cuz there’s a bunch of chicks back in B-more that could whip you. i done forgot my childhood, when truth is plenty of chicks i wasn’t trying to exchange hands wit. one time a chick caught me slippin, slammed me down, twisted my ankle. Shit, i done seen a girl with hands so fast. Komisty would’ve kicked most of yall ass.
BusGirlFeminismn
(they said it was gonna be the century of the woman but the game ain’t like that shit, they ain’t like that shit, had plenty of tricks to stop that lift. come on, come on, come on, how long we gonna put the women hate costume on? Hate women for what? so yall fake gangsta can pretend to be tough.)
The top five reasons a woman dies; she gave the wrong nigga a ride. then you got the saddos who kill themselves over broken heart valves. violence to self, violence to someone else. why take breath cuz some chick left?
BusGirlFeminismn
(but like i really gotta stop here, nigga, like ok ok ok, you sad and you don’t wanna live, yeah that’s soft as fuck, but like, i get it, i get it, you can’t handle yo emotions and you hurting so you just make that long term decision to solve that short term problem but how killing the chick make sense? You still ain’t gonna have her? So obviously you not sad as much as you mad your mommy took your favorite toy. Do you kill your homies when you don’t get a spot for pick up?)
BusGirlFeminismn
the deepest comfort from my sister stopped a real nigga from becoming bitter. Her convos saved her lil bro and made us closer. Sis, seen me so vulnerable, put me back together. Made me bolder. Bus Girl breaking my heart helped give me those memories instead of another six month karmic infatuation disease. We had a karmic bond, not unique love. The cheater turned himself into a side chick just to make sense of the illusion of trust. i ain’t even learn the lesson that once; 5 years later, karmic energy caught me slippin even worse - Pluto’s Curse.
BusGirlFeminismn
My sister didn’t really give a fuck about rap; i seen dream hampton documentary and finally understood why she skipped so many tracks. Bus girls been out here breaking hearts. And seeing niggas torn apart, All the rapper tough talk don’t hide them scars. The Rapper rapist, i ain’t never gonna stop loving your work, Chris, but that’s some shit that can’t never exist.
BusGirlFeminismn
Rosa Parks on a bus fucked white supremacy up. her dignity and reserve, had them kluckers disturbed. the front of the bus she took back - then moved to Detroit to keep herself intact
(they gonna say you a simp when you don’t hate women to feel like a pimp. but i get you niggas so worried about losing anything to a woman, calling them gold diggers when its obvious ain’t no point to gold without women. but i ain’t no betta, its like the whole society won’t let it go, won’t say its time to move on, what’s the next thing after women hate, what’s the next thing after women hate, what’s the next thing after women hate. Maybe that evolution is what we afraid of?Maybe that evolution is what we afraid of? Maybe that evolution is what we afraid of?)
I got what i need. In every version of the story, she chose me.
Performance by Brienne Herbert, Photography by Justin Milhouse
Bus Girl is a character in BEEF - VOLUME I, the best short story published on Substack in 2024.
Check out the link below to listen to the story if you haven’t already. My Rap Fiction work is written to be heard as much as read.
I have over 500 Subscribers on Substack, and that was a milestone in which I said I would be raffling Bus Girl caps, so I will be doing that early in the New Year, though I am not gonna lie; I am going to set a few aside for some supporters and fellow writers on this app that have made this journey to publish my fiction - a first for my entire life after 20+ years of writing - transformative for me as a person. Thank you. You know who you are.
Yeah, u.
Share this post